we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize