No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
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