You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
