id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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