These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Damn victory sex feels great
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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