yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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