come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
