i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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