So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
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