so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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