I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Enjoy the penises
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
