I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
cat food counts as protein by the way
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize