help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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