So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
