and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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