Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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