I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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