I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
there is puke in my bra ... again
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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