I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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