Where is the hickey?
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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