The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
