What a fucking waste of an outfit
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
