Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
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I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
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I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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