she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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