nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
