so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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