i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
