So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize