Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize