I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
