Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
