She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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