6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
