So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
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