How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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