Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Randomize
