we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
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It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
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I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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