While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
