I look better un-naked...
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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