she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
