i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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