ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize