I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Randomize
