The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
