We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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