Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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