i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Operation Purity has been aborted
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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