Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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