I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
A+ Viking dick
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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