It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
